Are we done yet?

Here's a cautionary tale for anyone living in staff accommodation with someone like Jimbo. James(Jump) passed out in the corridor and, instead of being helped up by Jimbo, proceeded to be undressed and abused with a variety of food stuffs. Anyone experienced in the insertion of foreign objects will know a good smattering of butter is essential for lubrication (apparently). By the time Jimbo had finished James was more greased up than a cross channel swimmer. Who stuck a swede up my arse? Anyone who thinks I'm talking about the Scandinavian barman in the Isba. Shame on you! I'm actually talking about the bulbous rutabaga vegetable which (apparently) is very popular for defiling unconscious co-workers.